The mothers and girls in my mother-daughter workshops love the ritual. We stand in a circle, form a web, and each share a thought about what it is, exactly, that we like about being female. Yesterday a 10-year-old girl declared that we (meaning girls and women) have better underwear than boys! I loved that one!! I hear a lot from women and girls about what they love about being female:

• friends
• conversation
• connection
• clothes
• hair
• being mothers
• breastfeeding
• and so much more...

International Women's Day was this week. We spend time looking around at where we've been, we spend time looking at how far we need/want yet to go, and I hope we spend time savoring what it is we have - our femininity, our unique way of viewing the world, our strengths, and our girlfriends.

Savor the parts of your feminine reality that you enjoy. Celebrate those aspects that bring you joy. Teach your daughter to do the same.

Yes, you read the title correctly! It is fabulous to be female and fifty. I should know; I have hit the big 50 and gone on past. It was a wonderful milestone and I vowed to make the decade of my 50's my best decade yet. And so far, it is!

You can do it too. How? Do a self assessment. Set some goals. And go for it. It sounds so easy and simple. But your aren't fooled, are you? You know that change is hard. Change is hard. Life is hard too. But it's lovely and it's worth it. The same is true of change.

I just received this workbook from Seth Godin. It's called Poke the Box Workbook. It's about initiative, fear of getting started, and how to get past those. I highly recommend it and hope all readers will click through and at least read the workbook. It takes only about 10 minutes. 

For those of you who need a little hand-holding, I'm putting together a new course called Fabulous to Be Female and Fifty. It is being designed for women in their 40's and 50's who feel dissatisfied with the status quo and want something different for the remaining 30 years of life. Yes, you probably have 30 years or more to live. What will you do with it?

Keep in touch. Maybe we can help each other. Women need community. We feed each other, encourage each other, and support each other. We get inspired from each other and we care about each other. Let's work together to become the people we want to be in these amazing decades of life.

My blessings to you all.

Amy

Do you know at least one middle-school-aged girl?

Filled with change, uncertainty, and doubt, the middle school years offer a chance for caring adults - mothers, teachers, coaches, aunts, grandmothers, neighbors, and friends - to nurture and guide an 11-to-13-year-old girl into becoming a strong and self confident woman. Your middle school girl is on the road to adulthood. And she needs guides, oh, does she need guides!

Middle school girls need strong women who are willing to tell the truth, about life, love, relationships, sex, and beauty. You know many truths in these areas. Your middle school girl needs to hear those truths. She's not getting them from the culture. She needs to get them from you. And your high school girls probably need to hear those messages too.

A Glamour Magazine poll just released tells us that 97% of young women have violent thoughts about their body. Yes, violent thoughts. Yes, 97%. We should be alarmed. And we should use our alarm and concern to become active and do something.

What to do? Use sound bites to instill positive messages and truths about beauty, sex, and relationships. Help a girl you care about understand her body, her emotions, her reality. Make sure she knows what her strengths are. And finally, love her. Love her for no good reason, except that she is. And because she is a girl you care about, that is enough. Tell her. Convince her that she is good, that she is enough, and that you love her. The hands you see in the photo here were created by middle school girls. On these hands the girls listed their strengths and the important people in their lives. Concrete actions help girls take in and live the truth. Once you tell your girl how special she is help her take it in more deeply through some action or ritual.

If you need help, attend one of my workshops (sign up for a community workshop or schedule your own), purchase my Growing up Female Home Study Course, or contact me to work out something else. I'd be happy to help you. The girls of today can benefit from your intervention and your support. They need you.

You have a powerful affect on those around you, especially those you love and care about. Use your influence. Make a difference.

A reader and fan sent me this poem. She thought it belonged here. I agree. When you read the poem, dear ladies, know that it is about YOU!

Phenomenal Woman

by Maya Angelou

Pretty wonder where my secret lies. 
I'm not cute or built to suit a fashion model's size 
But when I start to tell them, They think I'm telling lies. 
I say, 
It’s in the reach of my arms, 
The span of my hips, 
The stride of my step, 
The curl of my lips. 
I'm a woman 
Phenomenally. 
Phenomenal woman, 
That's me. 
I walk into a room 
Just as cool as you please, 
And to a man, 
The fellows stand or 
Fall down on their knees. 
Then they swarm around me, 
A hive of honey bees. 
I say, 
It's the fire in my eyes, 
And the flash of my teeth, 
The swing in my waist, 
And the joy in my feet. 
I'm a woman. 
Phenomenally. 
Phenomenal woman, 
That's me. 
Men themselves have wondered 
What they see in me. 
They try so much 
But they can't touch 
My inner mystery. 
When I try to show them 
They say they can't see. 
I say, 
It's in the arch of my back, 
The sun of my smile, 
The ride of my breasts, 
The grace of my style. 
I'm a woman. 
Phenomenally. 
Phenomenal woman, 
That's me. 
Now you understand 
Just why my head's not bowed. 
I don't shout or jump about 
Or have to talk real loud. 
When you see me passing 
It ought to make you proud. 
I say it's in the click of my heels, 
The bend of my hair, 
The palm of my hand, 
The need for my care. 
"Cause I'm a woman." 
Phenomenally. 
Phenomenal woman, 
That's me. 

They take on the task enthusiastically. They know what wonderful traits their daughters have. And girls name positive traits in their mothers. We should do this more. The girls and women shine more brightly when they are affirmed in this way. The image you see here is a Wordle collection created with the positive qualities that were listed in a recent mother-daughter workshop.

What positive qualities to the girls and women in your life exhibit? I urge you to share those qualities with the "owner" of the traits. The girl or woman will likely perk up and become even more fabulous. It reminds me of one of my favorite Henri Nouwen quotes, "Where we keep claiming the light, we will find ourselves becoming more and more radiant."

I've seen this strategy work and I think we could use more radiant people in the world. Try it, it's likely to enhance your life and ripple out into the world as well.